tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post2707498020889823040..comments2023-12-24T08:02:53.370-05:00Comments on Chicken Dinner Candybar: Fat Love Friday #4 - On Sunday, Oops!Marshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08281078470984165679noreply@blogger.comBlogger30125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-5573451135006086122009-08-02T12:42:24.888-04:002009-08-02T12:42:24.888-04:00i just wanted to say that i think agent lover tota...i just wanted to say that i think agent lover totally overreacted and obviously has issues with herself. i love this feature on your blog & i think it's fuckin awesome of you to make a regular update about fat girls rockin' the world and you have yourself a new visitor :)trixiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04544266606629432486noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-6413175776681397892009-08-02T00:51:40.522-04:002009-08-02T00:51:40.522-04:00Bunny: It's exactly BECAUSE magazines like Sev...Bunny: It's exactly BECAUSE magazines like Seventeen highlight all the skinny girls and hardly ever look at someone vaguely curvy. The playing field isn't equal to start with. Mars's post is an attempt to equalise that. And it's up to her to decide who's inspiring. She's found a gap in the market and she's filling it.Tiarahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04727840054929301428noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-31592593364175117682009-08-01T21:53:11.462-04:002009-08-01T21:53:11.462-04:00I love the looks these ladies are rockin'! Go...I love the looks these ladies are rockin'! Good picks for innovative stylistas.<br /><br />I think it's great that you are making the effort to include and highlight women with great style who are larger than typically referenced for style, but I think the problem goes beyond just labels. It's that they are being defined as "other." <br />Imagine you are a 16 year old girl who wears a size 18. Wouldn't you feel better about it all if every issue of Seventeen (or whatever magazine they read these days) had a girl yr size in it, as opposed to maybe once a year when they do that one article highlighting how fat girls can dress cute too?<br />That's the best metaphor I can think of. Why not just highlight women all together, regardless of size?bunnyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16820689442356779071noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-7089550025390368042009-07-25T16:29:26.275-04:002009-07-25T16:29:26.275-04:00Not that my opinion is really needed, but it doesn...Not that my opinion is really needed, but it doesn’t matter if being called fat <i>shouldn’t</i> be considered an insult or <i>you</i> consider it a compliment. If someone says something about you and you don’t like it, you should say something. If you’re the one who did the offending then you should apologize. It’s all very simple. (So I’m with both you!)<br /><br />Some people don’t seem to understand that you don’t “de-stigmatize the word fat” by calling <i>other people</i> fat. You do it being proud to label yourself as fat.alanahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03584615751827242204noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-43201592529914300432009-07-24T23:41:50.234-04:002009-07-24T23:41:50.234-04:00Love your stance, hillarygayle! Thanks for droppin...Love your stance, hillarygayle! Thanks for dropping by :DMarshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08281078470984165679noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-75820013578838306832009-07-24T16:30:53.238-04:002009-07-24T16:30:53.238-04:00I see nothing wrong with being called fat at all, ...I see nothing wrong with being called fat at all, and I wouldn't be any angrier at that than if someone called me redheaded or freckled (I am all 3 of these things). I don't see any of these things as an insult; they are simply descriptive words. Some people are still freaked out by it, however. I suppose they still have some bad connotations society has attached to the word: lazy, unattractive, always eating, things like that. It sucks, but those connotations are there in the ears of most people.<br /><br />That's neither here nor there. What all this amounts to for me is now I have found both Chicken Dinner Candybar and Agent Love, and both are going straight into the Body Positivism/Fashion folder on my RSS reader. :DAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-30810118525412134072009-07-24T11:41:26.336-04:002009-07-24T11:41:26.336-04:00Ali-bell...but what if you WERE gay? lol xDAli-bell...but what if you WERE gay? lol xDMarshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08281078470984165679noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-29943786138903444742009-07-24T08:12:16.805-04:002009-07-24T08:12:16.805-04:00it's interesting you compared 'fat' to...it's interesting you compared 'fat' to 'gay'... would you appreciate someone categorising you as gay if you have never identified yourself as gay?Alihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04039699501234621778noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-89366209310803108502009-07-24T03:21:35.773-04:002009-07-24T03:21:35.773-04:00How about a name change to...thick girl thursdays!...How about a name change to...thick girl thursdays! i think it's catchy =/ yes?<br /><br />Anyways, we all know you didn't mean fat in a negative way. But consider the name change! *nudge nudge*[ Julie ]https://www.blogger.com/profile/04789146764690831803noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-55368672803784310012009-07-23T19:53:04.524-04:002009-07-23T19:53:04.524-04:00"Agent Lover", hahaha! Ironic. There'..."Agent Lover", hahaha! Ironic. There's so much fat-hate oozing out, it's chapping my size 6 ass. I can't blame ya for trying to de-stigmatize the word "fat"; in fact, it's admirable. It's just a body shape, after all. It's only negative because people continue to buy into the idea that "fat = bad". Even I think so, instinctively. It's a very difficult thing to de-learn.Jhahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16985629384463009968noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-44850778949623456322009-07-23T15:25:59.057-04:002009-07-23T15:25:59.057-04:00Wow, thank you for the comments everyone :D I left...Wow, thank you for the comments everyone :D I left a final reply over at Marie's blog, but I wanted to reply here too :3<br /><br />Basically the problem is that she doesn't identify as being fat. There's nothing I can do about that, and really, she's free to see herself however she wants. My goal isn't to convince people they're fat. <br /><br />aspirationsofolyvil: I was trying to relate this to gay people reclaiming the word "fag," or black people reclaiming the "N" word. They are doing a similar thing by taking a word previously used to insult them and turning into a term to be proud of.<br /><br />Tiara: Here and on Marie's blog, you've said everything perfectly! Thanks so much for your support, it really brightened my day!<br /><br />Work With What You've Got: That's understandable. Some people will just never identify as fat because they choose to think of it negatively. And that's their perogative!<br /><br />therottenlittlegirls: I think both blogs are getting a lot of traffic from this, and there's no such thing as bad publicity I guess haha xD!<br /><br />Mikomb: Obviously, I think she's a beautiful, PLUS-SIZED lady. But I won't force her to see herself the way I do. She is free to be (well, she doesn't call herself thin)..."not skinny" if that's how she prefers to think of herself ^^;.<br /><br />Catherine_sr: Thank you for seeing both sides :) I agree, it's unfortunate that there is "blind rank closing" going on. But I take them with a grain of salt - people are just trying to support their favorite blogger, I s'pose! I'm glad you like Marie's style/blog, I agree I really enjoy them :D!Marshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08281078470984165679noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-40004163825720318002009-07-23T13:49:11.952-04:002009-07-23T13:49:11.952-04:00I see why Marie is upset by the title, but you off...I see why Marie is upset by the title, but you offered to rectify the situation and are now respecting her wishes (at the cost of some public awkwardness to yourself), and I commend you for that. On the bright side, this issue has engendered what I think is an interesting and fruitful dialogue. I'm just sorry to see that there have been personal digs against both of you left on both you and Marie's posts... that's not fair to either of you women...<br />And, on another note, thanks for introducing me to Agent Lover! I knew of Madam Owl via Wardrobe_Remix, but I hadn't known of Agent Lover before, and it's always great to have new blogs to read.Catherine Shuhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06759711296632260503noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-5544300149877550192009-07-23T12:53:20.890-04:002009-07-23T12:53:20.890-04:00Not only is that chick in denial, she's also d...Not only is that chick in denial, she's also dissing all the fatter fatties than she is fat! Poor thing. She needs educated.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-71263985845382339802009-07-23T11:08:16.959-04:002009-07-23T11:08:16.959-04:00Work With What You'Ve Got: even if they mean i...Work With What You'Ve Got: even if they mean it as a compliment? I mean, it's obvious Mars isn't -insulting- anybody. If Marie has some issues with the word "fat" because of personal history or whatever, fine, but no need to take it out on Mars and make her look like some demon or other (and then attacking Mars when she tried to speak up!).Tiarahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04727840054929301428noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-28608232078084433312009-07-23T11:05:55.273-04:002009-07-23T11:05:55.273-04:00"Hey I think this Agent Lover chick is overre..."Hey I think this Agent Lover chick is overreacting."<br /><br />I don't think so AT ALL. I wuld be pissed right off if someone took it upon themselves to call me fat. No. Just a WORLD of no.Nana Erinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00202166011433938916noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-69219479405732167872009-07-23T09:10:51.647-04:002009-07-23T09:10:51.647-04:00Hey I think this Agent Lover chick is overreacting...Hey I think this Agent Lover chick is overreacting. I dig what you're doing with this blog. It's part of the fat acceptance movement. We took back the word bitch, now we can turn to "fat". <br /><br />P.S. Think of all the traffic coming your way, I got to your site FROM the Agent Lover site.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-33532627820328055722009-07-23T05:19:12.602-04:002009-07-23T05:19:12.602-04:00Also, Mars, for your good intentions and pretty co...Also, Mars, for your good intentions and pretty cool blog, you have a new subscriber :)Tiarahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04727840054929301428noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-84202149971731504642009-07-23T04:51:04.640-04:002009-07-23T04:51:04.640-04:00aspirationsofolyvil: Have you never heard people s...aspirationsofolyvil: Have you never heard people say "that's so gay" around you?<br /><br />Mars: I'm with you. I don't know why people aren't able to take a compliment - being fat is awesome, and in some countries (like Malaysia) everyone above would be pushed into XXXL regardless of what they think because that's just how the clothes are made. Which can be annoying, because then you get stuck with daggy clothes, but instead of whining about "OMG THEY CALLED ME FAT" can't you all accept that SHE'S SAYING THAT IS A GOOD THING?<br /><br />gah, people confuse me sometimes.Tiarahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04727840054929301428noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-30814716092018388132009-07-21T12:37:47.489-04:002009-07-21T12:37:47.489-04:00Wow, since when do the words gay, jew, or black ha...Wow, since when do the words gay, jew, or black have a stigma? Totally not the same as calling someone fat, no matter how you pad around it.<br /><br />The thing about "fat" is that it's way more of an attitude and a personality thing than it is a physical thing. There are some bigger girls who ROCK THAT SHIT and you can't even notice it. <br /><br />Like, for example, if you see a group of really pretty girls together, and then you see their obligatory bigger friend who is really shy and obviously feels uncomfortable has no confidence, even if she was a size 4 or a size 12, she'd be the fat friend.<br /><br />If you see that same group of girls except the bigger friend is having a lot of fun and is super confident in herself, you won't even notice if she's bigger or not. That's what it's like with Marie. When you see her and talk to her and know her, all you see is a beautiful girl. You don't have to put a label on her other than "HAWT," basically.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-36693097886948204342009-07-21T10:41:51.780-04:002009-07-21T10:41:51.780-04:00Perhaps if we just focus on style, we can forget w...Perhaps if we just focus on style, we can forget what size a lady is. If you're concerned about showcasing a multitude of body types, maybe do it all the time rather than featuring those people with a particular body type and labelling them with a negative word and risk appearing rude.<br /><br />Celebrate the style not the size.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-64433058602659724702009-07-21T00:43:45.128-04:002009-07-21T00:43:45.128-04:00Marie - I sent you an e-mail, hope that clears thi...Marie - I sent you an e-mail, hope that clears things up :3!<br /><br />Gilda - I agree, I love her style :) I don't think "fat" has to be a negative term at all...Clearly, that's not how I'm using it here :/ Thanks for the input!<br /><br />Corazonesrojos - Wow, you've got awesome style , too! No wonder you've been featured :) Gosh, I think you guys need to stop tiptoeing around this word! If that's what we are, why isn't it okay to be called such? Unless someone is using it to obviously be hurtful...Don't you think "fat," is similar terms to other words with this kind of stigma ("gay," "jew," "black," etc) should be used with pride? <br /><br />I will ask permission from now on, I did apologize to Marie for that! I didn't realize the featured ladies would feel that way. I've also offered to remove hers if she desires :) <br /><br />I was just trying to show that "not a size 4" gals are just as stylish as their thinner counterparts. Gah, I'll spare you the preaching, but I hope that puts things into perspective a bit...?Marshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08281078470984165679noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-26417340862042545052009-07-20T23:33:14.414-04:002009-07-20T23:33:14.414-04:00I have totally been loving Marie for so long. She&...I have totally been loving Marie for so long. She's the bomb. And I kinda agree with her. I think it's important to ask people if you can feature them on FLF because you never know who's going to be offended by the term "fat." I've been featured on "fat" blogs and I've always been asked permission beforehand because although I am obviously fat, I'm the only one that can label myself that; no one else!<br /><br />-corazonesrojosAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-40267156710461741202009-07-20T22:22:30.561-04:002009-07-20T22:22:30.561-04:00she's fantastic!!!!! i love her style!she's fantastic!!!!! i love her style!Meaghan Kellyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10694845760885790729noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-83969983954084587512009-07-20T19:55:11.657-04:002009-07-20T19:55:11.657-04:00hellz to the yeah. i am no size 0 either, and ther...hellz to the yeah. i am no size 0 either, and there are times when i tell myself i've seriously put on weight. even then i'm comfortable with who i am because i KNOW who i am. <br /><br />but even if i call myself fat, no one else should, and certainly no one who doesn't know who i am personally! although you said all sorts of wonderful things about marie, (and it's all true, she rocks my boat), but i would personally be very hurt if someone did this to me. <br /><br />it's just... not nice at all.queengildahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06003182386445833818noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4012489693803937215.post-39295648057749406092009-07-20T19:45:39.406-04:002009-07-20T19:45:39.406-04:00Hey - Thanks for the comment and sweet write up on...Hey - Thanks for the comment and sweet write up on your blog...but I have to be honest, I'm a bit offended that you're categorizing me in something called Fat Love Friday, SON!!!!!!<br /><br /> You know I obviously ain't no size 4. And I don't put down anyone who is. I fucking love my body and I admire and respect all the other curvy confident women out there, but I would NEVER put another blogger or really anyone else for that matter underneath a title with such a negative connotation unless they identify themselves as that already. Ain't nobody allowed to call me fat homie!! Are you crazy!?!? I don't want to sound like an unappreciative dick but I have never once called myself a plus-size, pro-whatever fat fashionista. I don't give a fuck about that shit. To me putting labels on things just segregates everything more. Style is style girl. Why does it have to be labeled as skinny or fat or whatever you know?<br /><br />Again, I don't want to sound all bitch status but I hope you understand where I'm coming from.<br /><br />All the best,<br /><br />-Marie<br />agentlover.comAgent Loverhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06921947053562154133noreply@blogger.com